I don’t know when we all decided that Gwyneth Paltrow was attractive, charming, or anything different from a desperate-looking woman who just wants to be famous.

For some reason, Max Factor, the cosmetics label, hired Paltrow to promote its new “100 Years of Glamour” campaign, which disappointingly is not dressing up Gwyneth Paltrow as a 100-year-old woman.

BUY MY MAKEUP!

Instead, they decided to dress her up as icon of various decades.

With an organic and vegan gun pointed to their head, the Hollywood Reporter calls them “pretty spot-on”.

The results are laughably awful.

For the 50s, they chose Audrey Hepburn.

missing: cigarette, gloves, charm

For the 60s: Brigitte Bardot.

 just got out of the shower and threw on a sweater and eyeliner, come on in!

For the 70s: Farrah Fawcett.

buy my new single

And for the 80s (decade, not age), Madonna.

Tilda Swinton trips and falls into some child’s watercolors

These look like something she made all by herself with an intro copy of Photoshop to add more lights in the background than an Ellie Goulding single.

You don’t change clothes and put on a little makeup and magically become someone else.

Nobody told that to Gwyneth.