Farrah Abraham, former Teen Mom and receiving end of James Deen’s thrusts, sat down for an interview with Gawker (ironic considering she’s the star of “Backdoor Teen Mom”) and, man, she’s just as stupid as you expect.

Here are some excerpts from the exchange:

0:07 – Farrah says being the subject of the No. 1 post in Gawker history makes her happy.
0:40 – Farrah: “I mean, I am who I am, you guys are who you are. I mean, you write. Good for you.”
2:02 – Farrah: “I’m just pretty proud of myself.”
2:03 – A discussion on slut-shaming.
3:26 – Farrah says she wrote her book all by herself.
3:36 – I ask Farrah about her writing process. She tells me, “I guess I’m a passionate person.” She also says she looked up “weird words,” possibly even “slut-shaming,” although if she did, she’s since forgotten it.

Look, nobody expects Edna St. Vincent Millay levels of prose from this young progenitor, but this should be a good lesson to young girls—take your birth control, stay in school.

spot the difference!

In the words of the bastard love child of Billy Mays and Dan Savage: but wait…it gets better!

She has long maintained that her sex tape leaked accidentally, but the sex tape of her novel’s protagonist, Fallon Opal, is leaked on purpose. Abraham has been accused of orchestrating the release of her sex tape all along, and so in its weird way, this book is sort of like her If I Did It.

Is this a way of Farrah Abraham to finally admit that she, indeed purposely leaked her sex tape?

No, she already did that. After lying and saying she didn’t release it on purpose. She just hired someone to star in it. And an adult entertainment company to distribute it.

But purposely leak it? HELL NO.

This style of celebrities writing erotic fictional stories which represent real events in their lives but slightly modified to turn out in carefully different ways is nothing new—for example, Mob Wives Renee Graziano’s (who goes as Reign Grazi in the book—CLEVAR!) really disturbing sounding sex book released just a little while back.

But the fact that people feel compelled to write out their therapy sessions and then get a book deal for it is insane.

Part of you feels sad for this girl.

The other part of you kicks that part’s ass because she clearly signed up for all of this—from having the kid, to getting on a TV show to publicize that she had the kid, to making a sex tape, to releasing the sex tape, to releasing a book about if she made a sex tape.

Some women just want to make the world burn.

brought to you by Sherwin Williams